Monday, April 26, 2010

Old Videos

On Saturday evening when my parents came by we ended up watching some old VHS home movies of Caroline taken in 2005.  There are oodles more of her at a younger age, but these are the best because she is talking in them.  I had truly forgotten how much she was talking.  The first video on the tape we watched was when she was 15 months and I was shocked at the things she was saying.  Her behavior reminded me so much of Piper, but her language was unreal.  I think having a 21 month old that is only saying a few things really makes you forget.  She was saying so many words as clear as anything!  (Of course we thought she was brilliant beyond brilliant!!)

It was fun watching her dance around and do all kinds of funny little things. She was a camera hog then, so things have really not changed much.  She still likes to perform.  But what struck me most about these videos is the amount of time Jason and I had just to sit, watch and play with her.  We marveled over every little thing she did.  We were able to hang on every word.  We took soooooo many hours of video.  We just absorbed her.  Toward the end of the video, Bryce is born and things were still pretty much the same since he was only an infant.  Watching the video of Christmas 2005 was funny too because it was the first Christmas that Caroline really seemed to understand and I got to sit with her and let her slowly open up each gift and really reflect on it.  You got to hear every little squeal and every little word.  It was priceless.

I think in the craziness that is multiple children you forget how much time you got to take with your first born.  How carefully you made every decision and how easy it was just to dote on her.  I barely remember what that was like now.  I think it started to change after Bryce was born but didn't really change until he became mobile and you could no longer plop him into a seat while you sat and played with Caroline. 

And even though I have always prided myself on having such a good memory about things, it was weird watching those videos and not having a memory of a many of those moments even though they are really special even if nothing truly amazing was happening.  It was like getting into a time machine and seeing what our life with one child used to be like.  (I'm sure a video of our life pre-kids would be even weirder!)  The main thing I noticed when we first turned them on was how quiet it was with just one.  I don't even know what that is anymore.  Although I will say that having Piper didn't really add to the change much - by the time she arrived we'd already made the transition and adding her was just like adding another potato to the pot.  Of course I wouldn't trade my noisy house these days for anything, but it was pretty cool to be reminded of that brief time in our lives with only one child. 

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