Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The Real Story

It's hard to know what to believe when Caroline tells us stories about things from school these days. I wouldn't say she's lying to us about things, I just think it's more embellishment and imagination. Her behavior chart comes home almost every day with a green smiley face on it, so I know she's not having any real problems but it still baffles me. What's almost funny is that these are stories that SHE volunteers to us and nothing that the teacher has brought to our attention. She doesn't quite have the ability to realize what mommy/daddy might not want to hear - and I like it that way.

Like last night, she told me 3 different versions about supposedly pulling a girl's hair during recess. All 3 ended the same way with the teacher telling her to stand by the wall until the end, but how it actually played out were all different. I try to ask a bunch of questions to clarify what actually happened, but never got what seemed like the 100% real story. Usually she'll tell you a few versions and then say, "Well, here's the REAL story." Huh? Why didn't you tell me the "real" story right away? Sometimes I think, especially in a case like today's hair pulling incident, that she's not completely remembering what happened and her imagination embellishes it thereby clouding her memory of what actually happened. I mean, how many times have we put our kids in timeout and afterward ask them why they were in timeout and they really don't remember/know? It's just irritating to me that I can't get a straight answer on what actually happened and why she did what she did. One day a few weeks ago, she was supposedly pushed down and when we tried to get to the bottom of that story, it came out a bunch of different ways too. Again, nothing that I'm overly concerned about since I'm not hearing anything from her teacher, but I would like to know what really happened. I realize the teacher has 19 other kids she and her assistant are managing and to ask her about every little incident is too much - I'm not one of those parents.

Lest you think her story telling is only for hiding her behavior issues, she also tells stories about other kids in the same way. Like yesterday we heard a few different renditions of a boy and the odd clothes he wore to school. Apparently he was wearing "a work shirt, work shoes, and a bow tie." She tells us stories about other classes dancing in the cafeteria at lunch and about how she sees certain things around the halls of school - each time she tells it, the story changes.

She has such a bright and expressive imagination, I really shouldn't be surprised. I just wonder when we'll start getting more clarity because I have a hard time relying on the "truth" according to my almost 6 year old.

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