Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Drop Off Blues

Caroline has been doing really well with drop offs at school. She always asks my MIL to make sure she comes inside with her and my MIL does. (Most parents still do.) But my MIL doesn't do any of her morning 'chores' and is there more for moral support and is barely in the classroom more than a minute or two. Then she gives her a hug and kiss and Caroline goes and gets her 2nd breakfast (her school gets free breakfast) and sits in her chair.

One day last week, Caroline talked about being sad when my MIL and Piper took her to school and how sad it was to see Nana and Piper walking up the sidewalk. Then again today, my MIL told me that Caroline REALLY cried today when she left and now I figured out why.

Caroline's school, while it has a main entrance, mostly does morning entry/afternoon exit through the exterior doors to each individual classroom. The door is propped opened at 8:40am and is kept open for a while until all the kids are in - maybe like 15 minutes? But, the kicker is that Caroline's seat is in view of that open door so when my MIL leaves, she sees her walking away. (Her original seat was changed from when I was last there.) So instead of Nana just walking out and Caroline not seeing her, Caroline sits and watches her walk away. Of course that's hard!!

So of course now, I'm on the fence as to whether or not to say something to C's teacher right away or not. It's only happened twice but I'm just wondering if she should be moved. Then my other question is in regards to when the cooler weather sets in what do they do about the door. I have no idea what they do with those doors in the middle of winter since they don't have a handle on the exterior so someone would have to stand right there and open it over and over.

I was thinking of just going in late tomorrow and doing drop off tomorrow myself, but I also know that C has a much harder time at drop off when it's Jay or me and don't want to complicate things further. I need to get more specific logistics from my MIL on where exactly her seat is before I decide what to do. Is it RIGHT in front of the door, or just in direct view of being able to look out the door? Hmmmmmm. Of course, if I ask to have her moved, that means moving another kid into that spot, I suppose.

I think we'll see how the week progresses and decide. I refuse to be one of those parents who jumps all over the teacher for nothing when the situation will likely remedy itself.


Anonymous said...

Hang in there. I had to deal with this A LOT in the kiddie academy days. Kids would stand by the entranceway (we didn't have doors) and watch their parents, grandparents etc. walk down the long hall and leave. It did seem to make it worse. We did quite a bit of game playing activities before we had our breakfast to help distract. Given that she has a quieter activity, eating, first thing that makes it harder to engage and distract to take her mind off of being left as she watches N & P walk away. Bringing your concern up to the teach is a good idea. She'll be able to give some insight on how long the sadness lasts and maybe some tips for N on how to handle it! A lot of parents would share their concerns with us and it was so helpful all the way around :)
Your SIL

Katie said...

I would ask your MIL not to enter the room with C. I would talk to the teacher about that. Are all parents allowed in the room?

Erika said...

I don't really think that's an option at this point because my MIL said that pretty much all the parents go in. If she didn't go in, it would be very obvious to Caroline that she was one of the only ones that didn't have anyone in with her.

I don't know if that will change as the year goes on though. It's still pretty early - just hitting the one month mark. I'm going to do the wait and see thing for right now.

Katie said...

I think it's unusual for the parents to enter the room. Isn't it? At Em's preschool we aren't allowed in the room for precisely this reason. It's harder on them in the long run.

Erika said...

I think it depends on the school. One of the things about C's school is there are no buses since all the kids are within walking distance (much like city schools). So the older kids walk themselves and the younger kids come with siblings or parents. Plus, I think with the demographic of the school, having parents come in is encouraged since there are a lot of absent parents generally school wide. I know on the days I've dropped off, there were parents going into some of the older classes too.