Sunday, September 21, 2008

Here's the thing about having 3 kids...

We thought we were busy with 1 kid when we had just Caroline, then Bryce came along and we were overwhelmed. But time went on, we figured it out and when things were tough we each managed a kid, but it wasn't so tough to manage both at the same time. However we realized how little free time we had. So now you throw a third kiddie into the mix and what's it like??? Well, basically since July, I feel like I've barely had time to catch my breath. I've noticed that when my favorite magazine comes in the mail, I hope I'll get a chance to read it before the next one comes. Yes, I do get some online time, but MUCH less than what I had before. I find myself feeling sad about not keeping up with all of my friends' blogs and my online mom's community. I have chances to lurk from time to time, but just no time to really comment or participate like I used to. And then there's all the things that I want to do around the house that never seem to get done. Not the usual, daily/weekly tasks, it's the tasks that you see and nag at you because you don't like how something looks or want it to change but you have NO idea when you'll have time again.

For example, I've been staring at Bryce and Caroline's rollerskates sitting under the table in the foyer for weeks now. I had a place in mind for them, but just never had 2 free hands to do it. Then next to it we had the beach bag with all of our towels/suits too. Ugh. It has been calling my name for weeks. Finally, last night we came into the house after visiting with Jay's grandparents and both kids were occupied and Jason had Piper in the bouncer and I POUNCED. Skates in new home and beach bag and all accessories in the basement. BAM! A neat foyer. (Well, the table hasn't been dusted in weeks....) So that made me feel better until the next project comes along that wants to start taunting me.

All this and I'm not even back to work full time yet. I can't tell you how much we did today just to keep up and get ready for the week. It's exhausting. I'm scared about how much harder it's going to get when I'm not home here and there to be able to run a few errands during the day instead of putting them off until the weekend. And people wonder why we rarely get out on the weekends.

But I know all this too will pass. The kids will get older and more helpful and a lot less needy. Instead of spending my Sunday morning doing laundry and working on potty training a reluctant 3 year old, I'll hopefully be able to spend it a little more leisurely. Of course then, I'll miss the antics of said 3 year old and long for the "good old days." And eventually my baby won't be such a baby anymore and instead of nursing her what seems like every 10 minutes sometimes, she'll be sitting at the table arguing with her older siblings about how the lyrics to a song are supposed to be sung. And instead of having to hoist a kicking and screaming 4 and 3 year old into the house who are covered in sand and water and need a shower at 5:30pm, I'll be sitting on my deck reading a magazine while they watch football with their dad.

Life really is about give and take. It's really exhausting now since parenting is so physical and we have to do so much for them, but at the same time, they live their entire lives basically in OUR world. So the key is to enjoy the time rather than dwelling on the things that drive you nuts. And that's just so hard, especially when you're dragging yourself out of bed at 3:30am to nurse a 2 month old that you know will take an extrodinarily long time to burp after feeding her and you know if you put her down without extracting that burp, you'll be called back in a few minutes later to an unhappy baby with a wet sheet under her head.

Ah yes, motherdom of 3. I signed up, I know, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. But I sure would like an extra hour or two in the day for just me and an hour for Jay and me together. Of course someday we'll have nothing but together time and miss the kids. I'll never figure this parenting thing out.

8 comments:

BJ said...

I don't have better words then just saying excellent post. Your heart is in the right place and you are right, it can be hard at times, but in the end we wouldn't trade it for the world. Granted I have only one and can't imagine having three of her:>:>

jason said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Erin said...

I already feel this way with two kids... the lack of time for myself and time with my husband... and my husband has been even more down about it than me. Remind me not to let him read this! He's already reluctant to have another one! ;)

Erika said...

Jay, that's just gross.

I'm shocked that there's some actual flow to this entry. I was tired when I wrote it and totally thought I was rambling.

jason said...

Nah, it made perfect sense to me.

Lisa :) said...

I must laugh at Jason's entry. my husband and I have both said the same thing from time to time. LOL. I feel for you, I have been there done that. When my kids were little like yours my husband worked crazy hours. I felt like a single parent! Now that they are older, they are much better and they are more sufficient. Although, I can say I still feel like I can never keep the house clean, keep up on laundry and have time with my husband. We have to laugh, it seems that whenever you think all 3 kids are going to be out of the house, there is always one that seems to want to stay around that evening. I give you props. I went back to work after baby 1. Then when she was 6 months, I got pregnant with baby 2 and after he was born I became a stay at home mom. Baby 3 was born when baby 2 was 2 years old. I was a stay at home mom for 6 and 1/2 years and it was very hard. I can't imagine having 3 and working full time! Now they are 17,16 and 14 and they can still be hard work. But, when they drive you simply insane...you can get in the car and run an errand and leave them at home! I will say I had to laugh at the comment of "BJ" as well. I would like to see the two of them with 3 Sydneys! LOL! (she really is a princess and such a sweetheart whom I miss dearly!) Keep your chin up and as hard as it is to say....enjoy it because they really do grow up guickly!

Viv said...

I missed Jason's comment.... BOO!

I too feel like a single parent at times with Jay working a PT job 3 nights a week - it's CRAZY to go WAKE-BED 2 days in a row with the girlies. Love them to death but O.M.G!!!!!!!! And projects, who has time for projects! I can't even get my laundry folded and put away! Or my house cleaned! And I'm a NEAT FREAK - so it's CRAZY over here! (can ya'll tell it's a night that Jay has to work both jobs and I'm at my wits end LOL! Thank God there's a beer in the fridge, if I can stay up to enjoy it!)

Dawn said...

Just seeing this post now, but I could have written it word for word. While Brad has been out of town for basically two weeks (with the exception of two nights last weekend), and I've had to run the whole show at night, in the morning, plus work full time, I've managed to lose three pounds...by not eating! Why? I seriously don't have a second to eat for myself, since I'm constantly shuttling food, breaking up fights, giving three kids baths and shampoos, reading books, etc. So crazy! I keep trying to figure out how to get more hours in the day, but I just haven't quite succeeded...